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Topics - gursharn

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News & Information / Men as Likely To Be Harassed Online as Women
« on: July 19, 2017, 01:57:15 PM »
Men as Likely To Be Harassed Online as Women


A new study released by the Pew Research Center supports what some of us have argued all along about online harassment: that it affects men as much as women and that the problem should not be framed as a gender issue—or defined so broadly as to chill legitimate criticism.

If anything, the study says, men tend to get more online abuse than women, including serious abuse such as physical threats (though women are, predictably, more likely to be sexually harassed). However, when people are asked about free speech vs. safety on the internet, women are more likely to come down on the side of the latter. Thus, it is very likely future efforts at speech regulation will continue to be cast as "feminist" initiatives.

Online harassment has become something of a cause célèbre in the last three years. It has been explored (and deplored) in numerous media reports; it has attracted the attention of politicians and even of the United Nations.

A basic premise of these discussions has been that women, especially outspoken women, are specifically and maliciously targeted for hate, abuse, and threats; many feminists have claimed internet misogyny is the civil rights issue of our time.

The Pew survey of over 4,000 American internet users over 18 conducted in January challenges those contentions. Forty four percent of the men and 37 percent of the women said that at some point, they had experienced at least one of the behaviors the study classified as harassment.

Most of this abuse involved offensive name-calling and being embarrassed on purpose. However, 12 percent of men and 8 percent of women said they'd been the target of a physical threat; 6 percent of men and 8 percent of women said they had been stalked; 8 percent of men and 7 percent of women they had experienced "sustained harassment"; and 4 percent of men and 8 percent of women said they had been sexually harassed.

Men and women under 30, who are the most likely to spend a lot of time online, are, unsurprisingly, the most likely to experience all kinds of online abuse, including its more severe forms.

It's true that women who been targets of online abuse were more than twice as likely as men to describe their last such experience as extremely or very upsetting (35 percent vs. 16 percent). But, interestingly, there was no gender gap in actual negative effects of online harassment, be it mental stress, problems with friends and family, romantic problems, reputational damage, or trouble at work. Twelve percent of both male and female victims—or about 5 percent of all respondents—said that online harassment had made them fear for their or their loved ones' safety. One percent, with no gender difference, had been victims of doxing—the unwanted disclosure of their personal data online, ranging from real names for those who post under pseudonyms to place of work or home address.

Few will be surprised to learn that women under 30 were substantially more likely than their male peers—53 percent vs. 37 percent—to report receiving unsolicited sexually explicit images. But in a more counterintuitive finding, men in that age group were more likely than women—14 percent vs. 10 percent—to say that explicit images of them had been shared online without their consent. (For those 30 and older, the figure was 5 percent for both sexes.)

This differs sharply from feminist scholars' claims that 90 percent of so-called "revenge porn" targets women, a figure based on a self-selected and mostly female sample. But it supports a 2013 study by McAfee Security in which men were more likely to report both being threatened with having intimate photos of them posted online and actually having such photos posted.

More women than men in the Pew Study, 11 percent vs. 5 percent, said they had experienced gender-based abuse online. But this gap may be partly due to differences in what men and women perceive as gender-based. A woman who is called fat and ugly on Twitter is likely to see the insult as sexist; a man who has a similar comment slung at him will likely see it simply as a personal insult.

And all the dramatic claims about the terrible hardship of being a woman on the internet with an opinion? Entirely wrong: men in the Pew survey were almost twice as likely as women (19 percent vs. 10 percent) to say they had been harassed online due to their political opinions. Part of the disparity is no doubt due to the fact that men are more likely to talk politics on the internet; in one recent study, 60 to 65 percent of Twitter users tweeting on political topics were men. But it certainly doesn't sound like men who talk politics have it any easier.

There is really no way to massage the Pew data to fit the women-as-victim narrative—but some tried. Gizmodo's Bryan Menegus simply misstated the findings, asserting that although men are targeted more overall, "women—especially young women—make up an outsized proportion of users who experience the most severe forms of harassment, like stalking and threats." Vox's Aja Romano wrote that "more severe harassment disproportionately affects younger internet users, women, and people of color."

But the dishonest reporting prize goes to Slate's Christina Cauterucci, who cherry-picked the few numbers showing worse harassment of women, ignored the ones showing equal or worse abuse of men, and finished by upbraiding males for not taking online harassment seriously. Headline: "Four in 10 People Get Harassed Online But Young Men Don't Think It's a Big Deal, Says New Survey."

As bad as it is, Cauterucci's article highlights the survey's real gender split on the issue of safety vs. freedom online. Asked whether offensive online content is taken too seriously or too often excused, women are evenly split; men come down, nearly 2:1, for "taken too seriously." Among women under 30, a small majority (54 percent) agree that offensives online content is taken too seriously; but three-quarters of young men agree.

The divide was even sharper on the question of whether it's more important for people to be able to "speak their minds freely" or "feel welcome and safe" online: 56 percent of men opted for more freedom, two-thirds of women for more safety. (Interestingly, despite millennials' reputation for wanting safe spaces, young adults of both sexes were more pro-free speech than their elders—but the gender gap was still large: speaking freely was a higher priority for nearly two-thirds of men under 30 and only four out of ten women.)

Before anyone rushes to declare women enemies of freedom, it should be noted that the sexes actually don't differ all that much in their view of what should be done about online harassment. Only slightly more women than men (35 percent vs. 29 percent) say that elected officials have a major role to play in combating it; while women are more likely than men to see a major role for law enforcement (54 vs. 43 percent), the age gap on this issue is far larger (58 percent of seniors vs. 37 percent of young adults).

Meanwhile, there is a broad consensus that social media platforms and other online services have a responsibility to stop harassing behavior by users: 82 percent of women and 75 percent of men agree. Clearly, both men and women believe that some curbs are necessary, but they tend to want the lines drawn in different places. It is also likely that women's views of the issue are influenced by the false perception that women are singled out for constant and vicious abuse on the internet.

MRA Litrature / दादा जी की तेरहवीं
« on: July 18, 2017, 04:21:33 PM »

"मां अपने घर इतनी सारी आंटी क्यों आई थीं....इनके घर में शादी है क्या ?" --पॉँच छह वर्षीय पुत्र ने पूछा
"नहीं बेटा शादी नहीं है .इनके दादा जी की तेरहवीं है ,उसका न्योता देने आई थीं ."
"तेरहवीं क्या होता है मां ?"
"जब कोई मर जाता है तो उसके मरने के तेरहवें दिन घर मै पूजा पाठ होता है .पंडितों को दान दक्षिणा दी जाती है .उन्हे और जाति बिरादरी वालों को खाना खिलाया जाता है ,इसे तेरहवीं कहते है ."
बच्चे ने उत्साह से पूछा -"इसका मतलब जब कोई मर जाता है तो दावत होती है ?...फिर तो उस दिन घर मै लड्डू ,पूड़ी ,कचौडी भी बनते होंगे ?...अपने घर ऐसी दावत कब होगी मां ?"
मां ने मुंह बिचका कर खाट पर बीमार पड़ी सास की ओर इशारा कर के कहा --"ये मरेगी तब ."
बच्चा चहका --"जब दादी मरेगी तो अपने यहाँ भी दावत होगी ?"
"हाँ ."
बच्चे ने बीमार पिता को देख कर पूंछा --"पापा मरेगे तब भी दावत होगी ?"
तडाक से एक चांटा बच्चे के गाल पर पड़ा --"करमजले अशुभ बात मुंह से निकालता है ."
बच्चा रोने लगा था.वह नहीं समझ पाया कि उसकी गलती क्या है ...दादी के मरने कि बात शुभ और पिता के मरने कि बात अशुभ कैसे हो गई ?

Women Are Freezing Their Eggs Due to a 'Deficit' of Educated Men, Study Claims


According to a new, currently unpublished study, there just aren't enough educated men out there for comparable women to make babies with. That's why successful women are turning to elective egg freezing, a Yale researcher reports in her presentation at the recent European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology conference in Geneva, Switzerland.

Marcia Inhorn, a professor of anthropology and international affairs at Yale University, and her co-authors were interested in exploring why more women were choosing oocyte cryopreservation (or egg freezing). Recruiting participants from eight IVF clinics in the US and Israel, anthropologists conducted interviews with 150 women (114 in select US cities and 36 abroad) who had completed one cycle of egg freezing already between June 2014 to August 2016.

Researchers determined that most of the women weren't "preserving" their fertility because they wanted to focus on their careers, which is one commonly toted explanation. "It was clear early on but confirmed by the end of this study that the main reason this group of highly educated women were freezing their eggs, usually in their late 30s and early 40s, is that they had been unable to find a partner committed to, basically, marriage and family building with them," Inhorn tells Broadly. "In almost all cases, women told me they had been trying all throughout their education and careers to find a partner in life, but that it hadn't happened yet."

The study notes that this is a "reflection of a growing, but little-discussed gender trend, with women increasingly outnumbering male college graduates in both countries." In other words, Inhorn says, "it's a demographical issue."

She points to US Census data compiled by author Jon Birger in his book Date-onomics: How Dating Became a Lopsided Numbers Game, which found evidence of a growing educational disparity between men and women. For example, the study notes, in cities such as Washington, DC, and Miami, the difference between male and female college graduates was 49 percent and 86 percent, respectively (both Miami and Washington, DC were selected cities in this study).

"Because of this dearth of educated men to marry, women resorted to EEF as a technological concession to the 'man deficit,'" the study's authors report. "Almost all of the women in this study were heterosexual and wanted to become married mothers. Women lamented the 'missing men' in their lives, viewing egg freezing as a way to buy time while on the continuing (online) search for a committed partner."

Inhorn says often women feel like there's something wrong with them when they're unable to find a partner to build a family with. These findings, however, suggest that "it's not the women," she says. "It's that there literally are now sharp demographic disparities for women who would like to be with an educated partner."

She also notes that having the ability to freeze their eggs gave many of the participants a feeling of empowerment. "Almost all of the women that I spoke to were glad that they'd done it. They felt it had given them some measure of control, a kind of peace of mind, and it actually took the desperation out of dating and feeling like they were under the pressure of the biological clock."

"Women really said they felt empowered by doing it," Inhorn continued, "but the problem is one of gender and education, and no one's really been looking at that or talking about the fact that women are outpacing men. It's wonderful that women are exceling educationally, but it's also leading to some other issues that haven't really been explored well enough."

Destroyed By The Media, And Then Ignored: Victims Of False Rape Accusations


A ‘hapless’ woman in Rampur, Uttar Pradesh, tries to file a gang rape case, and is turned away by the police, forcing her to seek help from a court. She files a private complaint with the court, but instead of taking action on her complaint, the police officer in charge of the case demands sexual favours from her. She records her conversation with him and submits a CD as proof to higher police officials.

So far, a perfect case for a media storm, and it indeed becomes one.

“Rape victim asked for sexual favour by police”, headlines scream out loud, shaking up the entire police administration in Uttar Pradesh. In the backdrop of the government setting up anti-romeo squads, where police is out on streets to nab the stalkers and protect women, the case comes as a huge blow to the credibility of the police force, dubbing protectors as predators.

Media houses question the sensitivity of the government towards crime against women and the credibility of its police force. Front-page coverage of case follows; story goes viral with international media picking it up almost immediately, adding one more case to dub India as the rape capital of the world.

Daily Mail Online tweeted not one but several times on the story drawing angry reactions from the world over.

    Rape victim 'is told she has to have sex with a police officer if she wants her attackers arrested' in India https://t.co/pIt6qDL5qx
    — Daily Mail Online (@MailOnline) June 22, 2017

    Cop in India told rape victim to 'have sex with him' if she wanted attackers arrested https://t.co/WpsgCqTKz8
    — Daily Mail Online (@MailOnline) June 22, 2017

As the outrage was building up, with news channels ready to capture the next big development, the unexpected happens – the case turns out to be false. The alleged rape survivor, a con, had framed the cop because he was about to file a final report in a false gang rape case filed by her!

Unlike the usual cold response of police to false rape cases, this time officers from UP Police, who are active on social media, provided details of the conspiracy and confirmed that the woman had been arrested on charges of cheating and lodging a false case. The official Twitter handle of the UP Police reached out to media organisations, and asked them to report on actual facts of the case.

    #Rampur update ~ रेप केस झूठा पाये जाने पर महिला ने नाराज़ होकर दरोग़ा के ख़िलाफ़ भी लगाये अश्लीलता के झूठे आरोप। साज़िशकर्ता के साथ गयी जेल pic.twitter.com/2rRhuz60ZU
    — UP POLICE (@Uppolice) June 24, 2017

But now, there was an eerie silence. One could see only few regional papers following up on the story. No debates, discussions, thorough investigations or detailing of the conspiracy by the woman, or what the officer falsely accused of the crime went through. The truth behing the story of how a protector became a predator that reached millions in India and abroad now reached only a few thousands. This is a pattern I have observed for the last several years while working on false accusations of dowry, molestation, rape, sexual harassment against men.

More ...

Mumbai college student wasn’t raped or kidnapped, cooked up story after watching TV shows to harass friend


The college student’s claims that she was pulled into an Ecco car, taken to a secluded place in Charkop and raped were false, the police said on Monday, adding she cooked up the story after watching TV crime series to exact revenge on her friend.

Based on the woman’s complaint, the police filed a case on July 6.

The woman alleged the incident took place on Thursday when she was on her way to college. In her complaint, she said she was raped and left near Aksa Beach, with her limbs tied with rope.

More than eight teams were formed to probe the allegations.

Read more: Mumbai woman abducted and raped, told: ‘Asked you to stay away from him’

While one team questioned the woman, others got data including on her journey from Charkop to Aksa Beach.

The CCTV footage from Charkop did not show any Ecco car, said police. Instead, the woman was seen taking an autorickshaw to reach Marve in Malad (West).

The police traced the autorickshaw driver, who identified the woman, said police.

The technical analysis team found the woman was at Marve beach, instead of Aksa, where she claimed she was left. “All claims made by the woman turned out to be false,” said an officer.

The woman then confessed she came up with the story to exact revenge on her friend after a fight. She said as TV series showed gang-rape case witnesses being questioned for days, she thought of the story to put her friend through the hassle.

The police have left the woman with a warning for wasting their time.

शर्मा : नमस्कार केशव जी
केशव : नमस्कार आपके साथ कौन महाशय हैं
शर्मा : यह रोहित शर्मा हैं इनके विचार आपसे बहुत मिलते हैं इस लिए आपसे परिचय करवाने लाया हूँ
केशव : नमस्कार रोहित जी
रोहित : नमस्कार
केशव : अच्छा रोहित जी आप क्या करते हैं
रोहित : पेशे से इंजीनियर हूँ और आज कर दिल्ली कोर्ट मैं केस लड़ रहा हूँ
केशव : अच्छा तो आपने वकालत की है भाई वाह
रोहित : नहीं वकालत नहीं की बस वाइफ ने झूठा केस कर रखा है उसी को लड़ रहा हूँ
केशव : अच्छा आपका मकसद क्या है
रोहित : झूठ के खिलाफ लड़ना ही मेरा मकसद है
केशव : क्या आपने कभी झूठ नहीं बोला
रोहित : ऐसी तो कोई बात नहीं है मैंने भी कई बार झूठ बोलै है
केशव : तो अब बोलना बंद कर दिया है
रोहित : ऐसा भी नहीं है
केशव : तो आपकी लड़ाई झूठ के खिलाफ कैसे हो सकती है
रोहित : मैंने कभी किसी को जहर देकर झूठ नहीं बोलै
केशव : तो आपकी लड़ाई झूठ के खिलाफ न होकर सिर्फ एक पर्टिकुलर टाइप के झूठ के खिलाफ है
रोहित : क्या मतलब
केशव : चलिए छोड़िये इस बात को और यह बताएं जब आप केस जीत जायेंगे (झूठ को झूठ साबित कर देंगे) तब क्या करेंगे
रोहित : यह तो सोचा नहीं
केशव : तो फिर सोचिये क्योंकि जो लड़ाई आप लड़ रहे हैं वह आज नहीं तो कल ख़तम हो जाएगी
रोहित : आप क्या कहना कहते हैं
केशव : सिर्फ इतना की आप एक छोटी सी लड़ाई लड़ रहे हैं इसे बड़ी लड़ाई बनाइये अपने अधिकार की लड़ाई जो आखिरी सांस तक लड़ी जा सके और जिसमे आपका योगदान बहुमूल्य हो
रोहित : तो क्या मेरी वर्तमान लड़ाई कोई मायने नहीं रखती
केशव : रखती है परन्तु इसका मूल्य दूसरों के लिए उतना नहीं है जितना आपके खुद के लिए
रोहित : तो क्या वर्तमान लड़ाई नहीं लड़नी चाहिए
केशव : बिलकुल लड़नी पड़ेगी परन्तु इसे जीवन का लक्ष्य नहीं बनाया जा सकता
रोहित : मैं आपकी बात पर विचार करूंगा
केशव : बहुत बढ़िया आइये अब चाय पी जाये




MRA Litrature / KESHAV & SHARMA JI : Crime Against Men
« on: June 15, 2017, 01:43:12 PM »
KESHAV & SHARMA JI : Crime Against Men


Dr. G.Singh

शर्मा : देखिये केशव जी विशाखापट्नम मैं क्राइम कितना बढ़ रहा है
केशव : अच्छा कैसे
शर्मा : देखिये हर रोज 1 महिला गायब हो रही है
केशव : तो क्या
शर्मा : आपका क्या मतलब है यह कोई मुदा ही नहीं है
केशव : विशाखापट्नम की आबादी कितनी है
शर्मा : 20 लाख से ज्यादा
केशव : तो क्या 365 कोई बहुत बड़ा नंबर है और इनमे से बहुत सारी वह भी होंगी जो शादी या किसी दूसरे कारन से घर छोड़ कर चली गयी होंगी
शर्मा : जब भी कोई महिलाओं से सम्बंधित बात होगी आप तो विरोध करेंगे ही
केशव : ऐसा इलज़ाम क्यों
शर्मा : आपका पुराना रिकॉर्ड है
केशव : अच्छा चलिए आप बताइये की विशाखापट्नम मैं कितने पुरुष हर रोज़ गायब होते हैं
शर्मा : पता नहीं
केशव : अच्छा चलिए आप बताइये की विशाखापट्नम मैं कितने पुरुष हर रोज़ एक्सीडेंट मैं मरते हैं
शर्मा : पता नहीं
केशव : अच्छा चलिए आप बताइये की विशाखापट्नम मैं कितने पुरुषों की हर रोज़ हत्या कर दी जाती है
शर्मा : पता नहीं
केशव : अच्छा चलिए आप बताइये की विशाखापट्नम मैं कितने निर्दोष पुरुष हर रोज़ जेल चले जाते है
शर्मा : पता नहीं
केशव : अच्छा चलिए आप बताइये की विशाखापट्नम मैं कितने पुरुष हर रोज़ धोखादड़ी का शिकार होते हैं
शर्मा : पता नहीं
केशव : अच्छा चलिए आप बताइये की विशाखापट्नम मैं कितने पुरुष हर रोज़ आतम हत्या करते हैं
शर्मा : पता नहीं
केशव : अरे चलिए यह तो बता दीजिये की कितने पुरुष हर रोज़ रेप का शिकार होते हैं
शर्मा : क्या फालतू बकवास करते हैं केशव जी कहीं पुरुषों का रेप भी होता है
केशव : विज्ञान नाम की चिड़िया का नाम सुना है कभी | उसके मुताबिक सोच कर बताएं
शर्मा : चलो मान लिया की वैज्ञानिक आधार पर पुरुष का भी रेप हो सकता है | परन्तु सुना है कभी किसी पुरुष ने रेप की शिकायत की हो
केशव : चलिए इसे दो भागों मैं बाँट कर देखते हैं
शर्मा : जरूर
केशव : अगर पुरुष पुलिस कम्प्लेन करना कहे तो किस धारा मैं करेगा
शर्मा : IPC  376
केशव : IPC  376 सिर्फ महिलाओं के लिए है
शर्मा : तो और कोनसी धारा है
केशव : कोई भी नहीं पुरुषों को रेप सरक्षण किसी धारा मैं नहीं आता
शर्मा : इसका मतलब पुरुष रेप की शिकायत ही नहीं कर सकता
केशव : मोटे तौर पर नहीं
शर्मा : तो फिर सरकार गिनती कैसे करती है पुरुष रेप की
केशव : नहीं करती
शर्मा : हम्म अच्छा दूसरा पक्ष आप कुछ कहने वाले थे
केशव : आपने पिछली बार कहा था की ज्यादातर महिलाएं रेप की शिकायत नहीं करती
शर्मा : जी हां जितने रेप दर्ज़ होते हैं उससे तकरीबन 5 गुना ज्यादा रेप होते हैं
केशव : यह 5 नंबर कहाँ से आया
शर्मा : पता नहीं
केशव : चलिए छोड़िये महिला रेप की बात बाद मैं करेंगे अभी यह बताइये क्या यही स्थिति पुरुष की नहीं होगी
शर्मा : कोनसी स्थिति
केशव : शर्म के मरे जुबान न खोलने वाली
शर्मा : हो सकती है
केशव : हो सकती है या होगी ही
शर्मा : होगी ही
केशव : क्यों ?
शर्मा : क्योंकि भारत मैं पुरुष के आंसुओं की कोई कदर नहीं उनका मज़ाक बनाया जाता है जो रोते हैं
केशव : बिलकुल सही भारत मैं रोटी हुई महिला को सभी लोगों का समर्थन परन्तु रोते हुए पुरुष को दुत्कार पड़ती है  पुरुष के लिए रेप के बारे मैं जुबान खोलना महिला से ज्यादा मुश्किल है
शर्मा : ठीक
केशव : चलिए अब यह बतयइए की कितने पुरुष डोमेस्टिक वायलेंस का शिकार है
शर्मा : केशव जी आप यह सवाल जवाब छोड़िये और मुद्दे की बात पर आइये
केशव : मुद्दे की बात यही है की क्राइम बढ़ रहे हैं यह चिंता का विषय है परन्तु क्राइम का मतलब सिर्फ महिला के खिलाफ होने वाले क्राइम से नहीं है
शर्मा : ऐसा तो मैंने नहीं कहा
केशव : बिलकुल कहा
शर्मा : कब कहा
शर्मा : मेने सिर्फ उद्धरण दिया था
केशव : आपने उद्धरण नहीं दिया बल्कि आपको क्राइम के बारे मैं पता ही यही था की कितनी महिलाएं गायब होते है इससे हटकर कुछ पता ही नहीं था

शर्मा : हाँ यह बात तो है
केशव : और सिर्फ इसी जानकारी के आधार पर आपने कह दिया की क्राइम बढ़ रहा है
शर्मा : सही कहा आपने
केशव : ऐसा क्यों
शर्मा : शायद हम पुरुषों के खिलाफ होने वाले क्राइम को क्राइम ही नहीं मानते
केशव : बिलकुल सही और आप मुझ पर इलज़ाम लगा रहे थे की मैं महिला विरोधी हूँ
शर्मा : अरे वह तो वैसे ही
केशव : तो क्यों न हम शर्मा जी को पुरुष विरोधी का ख़िताब दे
शर्मा : आपकी मर्ज़ी है जैसा आप ठीक समझे पर इतना याद रखिये चाय पिए बगैर मैं जाने वाला नहीं हूँ
केशव : चलिए पीते है
शर्मा : चलिए

Study Finds That Men Like Nice Women, But Not the Other Way Around


Scientifically, nice (heterosexual) guys might actually finish last. A study published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin recently found that while men were attracted to nice-seeming women upon meeting them, women did not feel the same way about men. Researchers from the University of Rochester, the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign and the Interdisciplinary Center (IDC) Herzliya in Israel investigated a possible mechanism explaining why women and men differ in their sexual reactions with receptive opposite-sex strangers.

One hundred and twelve undergraduate students volunteered for the study at a university in central Israel. The volunteer pool was split evenly between men and women, and participants were paired randomly with an opposite-sex individual they hadn’t met before. The study examined burgeoning sexual interest and the participants’ feelings on the possibility of long-term dating with their new “partners,” and how those connected to their perceptions of a personality trait the study calls “responsiveness.”

In the study, responsiveness is defined as a characteristic “that may signal to potential partners that one understands, values and supports important aspects of their self-concept and is willing to invest resources in the relationship.”  A limitation of this definition, the authors state, is that the concept of “responsiveness” is ultimately elusive—it can mean different things to different people. Nevertheless, the researchers felt they could use their definition to help get at some of the different ways men and women perceive potential partners.

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"sexual desire thrives on rising intimacy and being responsive is one of the best ways to instill this elusive sensation over time," lead researcher Gurit Birnbaum explained in a press release. It makes sense: responsiveness is key to any relationship, whether it’s a friendship or a romantic union.

But it’s not as important of a factor when you first meet someone, according to the study. "Our findings show that this does not necessarily hold true in an initial encounter, because a responsive potential partner may convey opposite meanings to different people,” stated Birnbaum.

In the first of three studies, researchers explored whether women or men perceived a receptive opposite-sex stranger as sexually desirable and, if so, whether that “responsive” quality registered as overtly feminine or masculine. The researchers found that men who perceived possible female partners as responsive found them to be “more feminine and more attractive.” Past research suggests that physical cues of femininity stimulate sexual attraction because they suggest higher estrogen levels, better overall mate quality and solid reproductive health.

On the other hand, women didn’t necessarily perceive a responsive man as less masculine, but they also did not find a responsive man more attractive. What’s more, when women perceived their male partner to be responsive, they were less attracted to the man.

In other words, it appeared that in an initial encounter men liked nice ladies; women thought nice guys were kind of lame.

The second study required participants to engage with either a responsive or unresponsive person of the opposite sex, then interact with them online while detailing a current problem in their life. The goal here was to remove the potentially confounding elements of live social interaction (smiling, physical attractiveness) to see if they could isolate how much responsiveness—or niceness—played into attraction.

Again, the men in the study thought responsive and attentive women were more attractive as potential partners, while women found men with those same traits to be less desirable.

The third and final study presented in the paper sought to test specifically whether the mechanism by which “responsiveness” motivated individuals to pursue relationships was, in fact, sexual arousal. To do so, they replicated the second study, but added a specific measure of sexual attraction. They then found that when men found women to be responsive, it led to a heightened sexual arousal among men. That, in turn led to greater desire for a relationship.

While the studies shed some light on why men find responsive women more sexually desirable, Birnbaum explains that researchers are still unsure why women are less sexually attracted to responsive strangers than men.

“Women may perceive a responsive stranger as less desirable for different reasons," said Birnbaum in a press release. "Women may perceive this person as inappropriately nice and manipulative (i.e., trying to obtain sexual favors) or eager to please, perhaps even as desperate, and therefore less sexually appealing. Alternatively, women may perceive a responsive man as vulnerable and less dominant.”

So for now, the question “what do women want?” will remain unanswered.

पार्क में बैठे दो बुजुर्ग

एक पार्क में दो बुजुर्ग बैठे बातें कर रहे थे ...।

पहला :— मेरी एक पोती है शादी के लायक है बी.ई. किया है, जॉब करती है,। कद 5' 2" इंच है, सुन्दर है , कोई लड़का नजर में हो तो बताइयेगा ..।

दूसरा :— आपकी पोती को किस तरह का परिवार चाहिये..?

पहला :— कुछ खास नहीं ... लडका एम.ई./एम.टेक. किया हो,  अपना घर हो, कार हो, घर में एसी हो, अपना बाग बगीचा हो अच्छा जॉब, अच्छी सैलरी, कोई
लाख रू. तक हो ...!

दूसरा :— और कुछ..इन सब के अलावा... ?

पहला :— हाॅॅं ...सबसे ज़रूरी बात, अकेला होना चाहिये ... माँ -बाप, भाई - बहन नहीं होने चाहिये, वो क्या है लड़ाई - झगड़े होते है ...!

दूसरे की आँखें भर आईं ...। फिर आँसू पोंछते हुए बोले

दूसरा :— मेरे एक दोस्त का पोता है उसके भाई - बहन नहीं हैं, माँ-बाप एक एक्सीडेंट में चल बसे, अच्छी जॉब है डेढ़ लाख सैलरी है, गाड़ी है बंगला है, मगर उसकी भी यही शर्त है लड़की वालों के भी माँ -बाप, भाई बहन या कोई रिश्तेदार ना हों, कहते-कहते उनका गला भर आया ...।

दूसरा :— अगर आपका परिवार आत्म हत्या कर ले तो बात बन सकती है आपकी पोती की शादी उससे हो जाएगी और वो बहुत सुखी   रहेगी.।

पहला :— ये कया बकवास है ...। हमारा परिवार क्यों आत्म हत्या करे ... ? कल को उसकी खुशियों में, दुख में कौन उसके साथ, उसके पास होगा ...?

दूसरा :— वाह मेरे दोस्त... खुद का परिवार, परिवार, और दूसरे का कुछ नहीं,।

मेरे दोस्त अपने बच्चों को परिवार का महत्व समझाओ ...। घर के बड़े, घर के छोटे सभी अपनों के लिए जरूरी होते हैं,। वरना इंसान खुशियों का और गम
का महत्व ही भूल जाएगा,ज़िन्दगी नीरस बन जाएगी ।.

पहला बुजुर्ग अब बेहद शर्मिंदा हुआ । ,

Techie ends life after mother-in-law refuses to send his wife, kids with him to Australia


COIMBATORE: A 36-year-old man, working as a software engineer in Australia for the last five years, committed suicide at RS Puram in Coimbatore on Saturday evening.

The deceased has been identified as U Rajkumar of Kuttimanai Nagar at Tindivanam in Viluppuram district. He committed suicide by hanging himself from the ceiling of his rental apartment.

Rajkumar's wife U Anubama, 26, gave birth to twin babies on June 6. He planned to take his wife and the children to Australia within two weeks. However, his mother- in -law refused him to take his wife and children to Australia. She fought with him.

Rajkumar left a suicide note. In his suicide note, he wrote that he had great love for his wife and children. But his mother-in-law did not allow him to take his wife and children to Australia. This had forced him to commit suicide, police said quoting the suicide note.

Rajkumar married Anubama of Ambikapuram in Palakkad district six years ago. The couple did not have children and she was taking treatment in Rao Hospital at RS Puram. Later, she became pregnant.

Rajkumar reached Coimbatore from Australia on May 24 and took an apartment on rent. Anubama and her parents also came to Coimbatore from Palakkad and stayed with them.

Anubama was admitted to hospital for delivery last week.

Rajkumar spent time with his wife and two babies at the hospital and used to return to the apartment for taking rest.

Police said he planned to return to Australia on June 26. He went to the hospital on Saturday evening and told his wife that he planned to take her and the children to Australia on June 26. But his mother-in-law opposed her daughter and grandchildren going to Australia with him. She allegedly fought with him.

Rajkumar told his wife that he would return after taking bathe at the apartment. But When he did not return after a long time, Anubama told her father K Unnikrishnan to go the apartment to check. Unnikrishnan went to the apartment and found his son-in-law's body.

The RS Puram police registered a case under section 174 CrPC. Further investigations were on.

« on: June 09, 2017, 10:39:07 AM »
Dr. G.Singh


केशव : और शर्मा जी सुनाइए कुछ नया ताज़ा

शर्मा : केशव जी आप भूत मैं विश्वास करते हैं
केशव : क्यों क्या बात हो गयी
शर्मा : कुछ नहीं अखबार देख कर आपसे जीकर किया
केशव : शर्मा जी धर्म ग्रन्थ और विशेषज्ञों का मानना है की भूत होते हैं 
शर्मा : और आपका क्या मानना है
केशव : मेरा मानना या नहीं मानना मायने नहीं रखता
शर्मा : ऐसा क्यों
केशव : शर्मा जी मैं भूत परैत विशेषज्ञों नहीं हूँ
शर्मा : यह क्या बात हुई
केशव : बिलकुल यही बात है मैं भूत के बारे मैं कुछ नहीं जनता इस लिए अपनी राय भी नहीं बना सकता
शर्मा : तो आप क्या कर सकते है
केशव : सिर्फ किसी विशेषग की रे से सहमत या असहमत हो सकता हूँ उसके तर्कों को समाज कर
शर्मा : और जो मंदिर मैं बकरे की बलि दी जाती है उसका क्या
केशव : इस मामले मैं भी मैं विशेषग नहीं इस लिए गलत या सही निर्धारित करने का तर्क मेरे पास नहीं है
शर्मा : बात तो आपकी ठीक है फिर भी कुछ आपकी राय तो हो सकती है
केशव : हो सकती है परन्तु उस राय का महत्व क्या है जो ज्ञान पर आधारित न होकर सिर्फ इस जिए दी जाये क्योंकि देनी है
शर्मा : सही कहा आपने ऐसी रे की कोई महत्व नहीं है

MRA Litrature / Har Pal Mai Khush Hoon
« on: June 01, 2017, 08:57:57 PM »
Har Pal Mai Khush Hoon

zindgi hai choti par har pal mai khush hoon
school mai khush hoon, ghar mai khush hoon
aaj paneer nahi hai, daal mai hi khush hoon
aaj gadi mai jane ka waqt nahi, do kadam chal ke hi khush hoon
aaj doston ka saath nahi, kitab padke hi khush hoon
aaj koi naraaz hai, uske is andaz mai bhi kush hoon
jisko dekh nahi sakta, uski awaaz mai hi khush hoon
jisko paa nahi sakta, uski yaadon mai hi khush hoon
beeta hua kal ja chuka hai, uski meethi yadain hai, unme hi khush hoon
aane wale pal ka pata nahi, sapno mai hi khush hoon

MRA Litrature / Please Pass the Biscuits
« on: June 01, 2017, 08:44:49 PM »
Please Pass the Biscuits

When I was a kid, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then.  And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work.  On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage, and extremely burned biscuits in front of my dad.  I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed!  Yet all my dad did was reach for his Biscuit, smile at my mom and ask me how my day was at school.

I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the biscuits.  And I'll never forget what he said:  "Honey, I love burned biscuits."
Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his biscuits burned.  He wrapped me in his arms and said, "Your momma put in a long hard day at work today and she's real tired.  And besides... A burnt biscuit never hurt anyone!"

You know, life is full of imperfect things... And imperfect people.  I'm not the best at hardly anything, and I forget birthdays and anniversaries just like everyone else.  What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each others faults and choosing to celebrate each others differences, is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.

So...please pass me a biscuit. And yes, the burned one will do just fine!

Life is too short to wake up with regrets... Love the people who treat you right and forget about the ones who don't.


हसो और हसाओ / Is it bad to be Alone
« on: June 01, 2017, 08:40:26 PM »
Is it bad to be alone

Is it bad to be alone?
To feel the best in midnight air?
To see the light in a fallen star?
To hear the words of love,
Lost in the cold winds of the night before?

Is it bad to be on your own?
To feel the sweet embrace
Every time you go to sleep?
To see the truth in people's eyes?
To hear the sound of silence?

Is it bad to want someone?
To feel his hands around you,
Wanting that moment could last forever?
To see the infinity in his eyes?
To hear the angel's sing?

In that way, I want to be alone forever…

हसो और हसाओ / Ae Zindagi
« on: June 01, 2017, 08:38:43 PM »
Ae Zindagi

Ae zindagi jab se tumse mulaakaat hue meri,
Yun laga ki khud se khud ki pehchan hue meri,
Mil ke tujhse phir kabhi kisi aur ki chahat na hue......

Din guzarte rahe aur zamaane ho gaye,
Manzil hai ek aur do raahi chal pade,
Jab se thaama hai tumne mere haatho ko,
To phir kisi aur ke saath ki chahat na hue........

Mehfilo me bhi aur tanhaaiyon mein bhi,
Bas har pal tu aur tere khayal hi yaad aate rahe,
Khushiyo mein ya dard bhari purwaiyon mein bhi.......
Jabse tumne mujhe kiya hai shamil
To kisi aur ki hone ki chaahat na hue........

Iss dil ne to maangi hai bas ek dua,
Tu yun hi karti rahe sada pyar .........
Jab se tumne mujh par apna dil luta diya hai ,
Kisi aaur ke pyar ki bhi ab chahat na rahi........

Pa liya hai maine bhi ab to woh sukun,
Ji liya hai har woh pal jisme thi meri zindagi basi,
Baad usske to ab zindagi kya hai maut ki bhi chahat na rahi ....!!!

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